We are often surrounded by what I call ‘acquaintances’
especially when we are doing just fine in our careers. Friends will always come
around to share in the joy. Even when
there are misfortunes, some of them will still gather around you either to sympathize
with you or to watch how affected you will be, but wait a bit, are they really
friends?
Take for example what happens on the Social
Network where you could have a huge friends’ list and seems to look popular but
in reality that list might be a mirage because you might never enjoy the real
benefit of friendship from such friends.
Some friend on the network only cares about the number of friends in
their list than the relationship they have with those friends. Although you may derive some advantages from these,
it can never be compared with what a true friend is all about.
The following are some of the criteria to
help you determine who among your acquaintances is a good friend.
A
True Friend is Trustworthy: You should be able to confide in your friend
and trust him with your secrets. A 16
year old Ann said “my friend would always
tell me her secrets and because of that I thought I could trust her with
mine. So one day, I told her that I had
a crush on a boy; she went right out and told others about it. I was devastated”. Betrayal you may say, yes a good friend is
not out there to draw words out of your mouth so as to make news out of
it. Beware of friends who discuss other
people’s matter to you because they will also discuss your matter with other
people.
A
True Friend is Self Sacrificing: In every relationship one must be stronger
than the other. A true friend recognizes
when you are weak and steps out to bridge the gap. Which of your friends has shown a sacrificing
spirit? “A true friend will keep seeking
not his own advantage but that of the other person” 1 Corinthians 10:24. I lost my mum when I was about to take my
final paper in my final examination in the Higher School, it was my friend
who wrote to the school authority appealing that the examination be
postponed because that single paper would have made me to stay one extra year
in the school, and her appeal was granted.
I was given extra one week to mourn my mother and the whole class came
back to sit for that examination. You also should have such friends.
A
True Friend Helps You to Become a Better Person: Your
true friends are those that can help you to reach your potentials. Some friends will hide good things away from
you and will always be on the rush to deliver bad news to you. Do your friends see the potentials in you and
encourage you to do your best. Make
friends with those wiser and higher than you so that you will learn from
them. “He that is walking with wise person will become wise but he that is
having dealings with the foolish ones will fare badly” Proverbs 12:20.
Please note that for you to attract good friends, you also
must be good because you will only reap what you sowed. When you expect loyalty from your friends,
you must also show loyalty to them. It
is also nice to know a lot of people but aim at quality and not quantity. Good friendship is built on the foundation of
common values. This means that your
friends should share your spiritual, moral and ethical convictions.
Also do not set high standards for your
friends because you will end up being disappointed as no one is perfect, at the
same time if your standard is too low, you will settle for anyone and this is
not good either. Be a true friend and
you will have good friends.
