You may have been in a relationship for many years hoping to get a marriage proposal from your partner but alas! He is not forth coming. Perhaps the whole thing is getting unbearable and frustration is setting in, you are about quitting, you need to check if there are some issues stopping your partner from making such decision. These five issues may be responsible for the break-ups:
Family Resistance:
Albeit you and your partner may love
each other very well and are interested in spending the rest of your lives
together, the unsurpportive attitude of either of the family can be very
devastating on the relationship. Most
times you hear young women say “it is between me and my husband” and doesn't care what any other person may feel, this assertion is very wrong because when
a family especially that of the man is not ready to give a hand, the man finds
it difficult to make a decision. He may
not tell you the war going on in his family just because he loves you and will not
want to hurt you but then the decision to go ahead with a marriage is unlikely.
Despite the fact that some partners
marry without the approval of their families, the marriage is always not a
happy one as those involved are usually on their own when challenges come. A little more time, the couple starts blaming
each other for their woes.
Many long relationships that have
not seen the light of the day are as a result of family resistance. To save yourself from that unending
relationship and eventual disappointment, familiarize with the family you are
about to be with, you will know their opinion of that relationship to make the
right decision at the right time.
Unfeasible Expectations:
You must have concluded in your mind the qualities
you want in a partner and you are not ready to compromise your taste. Sometimes in the desire
to have a ‘dream marriage’, we set unrealistic goals and expectations for our
partners. We often times have a description of the type of partner we want to
marry (the physical attributes, educational qualifications and material
possessions) and when they do not meet our expectations, we conclude that the
partner is not the right person for us and then look for excuses to get rid of
them.
Don’t set unrealistic
goals for your partner and don’t expect too much. Know that human beings are not perfect. In fact, love is about giving and sacrificing. Although these are not enough for marriage,
friendship and trust must be part of relationship so that the union will stand
the test of time.
Always think of what your contribution will be in a relationship,
instead of expecting too much from your partner. Mostly, we think that a
partner is at fault, we don’t see our own fault. If you really love your Partner
and wants to spend the rest of your life with him/her, don’t expect too much,
take the person the way he is and everything will fall in place.
Ego
Love is blind they say but wait, is it really blind? I doubt it, the reason being that while
partners may seem to be blindly in love, their eyes are widely open and
watching each other.
Partners who because of their self esteem are not
ready to obey little rules of marriage i.e. respect, patience, accommodation,
sharing, caring, sacrifice etc finds it
very difficult to have a successful relationship.
When you treat your partner with disdain and without
care, the resultant effect is doubt.
Your partner will not be sure of what the future will hold for the
relationship. People will always work
with what they see at present, if all you see in your partner is negativity,
you will only save yourself the trouble of suffering so much in the future by
terminating that relationship.
Lack of Communication
There is nothing that kills a relationship like
when there is no room to trash out matters.
Not letting your partner know your position on issues that may get in
the way of your relationship is not healthy.
Unresolved issues have a way to undermine the interest a partner may
have in a relationship. For example, you
just closed from your office and decided without prior notice to visit your
partner, may be to give him a surprise gift, the door just opened and you see a
lady watching the television in the sitting room, you just quickly closed the
door and run away as fast as your legs can carry you without inquiring who the
lady is. You then pick up your telephone
and call him to say how disappointed you are and how bad he is. This attitude will definitely put the success
of that relationship in uncertainty.
The best thing to do in this circumstance is to
initiate a communication immediately and find out who that person is. The person you had seen may have been his
sister, neighbor or colleague that you did not know. When partners communicate, a lot of troubles
will be solved before resentments are formed.
If there are still other reasons that you know,
please share it in the comment box.