Showing posts with label Marriage/Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage/Love. Show all posts

Habits That Can Delay Or Stop Your Marriage Proposal


  

After a certain age, every single girl who has the intention of getting married will begin to look out for a suitor.  Unfortunately many who thought that beauty, academic qualifications, family background and status in the society will make this journey a safe sail for them has been greatly disappointed.

Every endeavor in life is guided by rules and regulations and marriage is not left out. Certain things if not done properly will make getting married a herculean task but if you want to have a smooth journey in your quest to getting married take these tips in consideration.

How To Have a Blissful Marriage Even When the Woman is the Breadwinner




The unfavorable economic situations that is negatively impacting on individuals as well as organizations has brought with it loss of businesses and high rate of unemployment.  The irony of which the men are worst hit by this ugly trend, thereby making most women who run small businesses breadwinners of their various homes.

When this downturn happens, the woman takes over the responsibility of carrying the load of the family.  The responsibilities that were probably shared by both of them will now be shouldered by the woman alone or she will be the one who contributes ninety percent to keep the family moving.

While some women carry this cross with all sincerity and happiness, others find it very difficult to bear and consequently despise their husbands.  

Negligible Things That Can Destroy Your Marriage

Every married person is aware that it takes even more than hard work to build a strong and happy marriage. At the beginning, we were made to believe that marriage is a bed of roses but as we move ahead in our relationships, we come to the knowledge that you need to put your best to make your marriage work.

There is also this false belief that only big misdeeds like: infidelity, money, addiction, adultery etc can wreck a marriage.  Often times, you realize that the foundation of once solid relationship has been quietly destroyed by little and negligible things without you even realizing it.  
Some of the canker-worms to watch out for are:


Not Showing Appreciation. 

Saying ‘Thank you’ to every little favor done to a partner is a great way to show appreciation to that partner.  This little word of appreciation goes a long way to boost ones morale which may spur him into more actions: By thanking a partner, you are saying: “I see you, I acknowledge you.” Likewise, he should be thanking you, too. Otherwise there’s a tendency to start playing the ‘who did more’ game, which quickly leads to resentment. The more grateful you are, the more likely you build a strong relationship. Trust me.

What Does Valentine Mean to You



Show True Love
Valentine is here again, the day set aside to celebrate pure love demonstrated by a Priest known as Valentine when hedisobeyed Emperor Claudius II’s decree that Soldier must remain unmarried.    Claudius handed down this decree believing that soldiers would be distracted by their wives and will not be able to concentrate on fighting if they are to be married or engaged.  Valentine defiled the orders of the Emperor and performed marriage ceremonies for couples secretly.  As a result of this defiance, Valentine was put to death on February 14.  After his death, he was made a Saint.

As Christianity spread through Rome, the priests moved the feast of Lupercalia (a pre Roman Pastoral Festival to avert spirits and purify the city, releasing health and fertility.  It was also for pairing of young men and women) to February 14 and named it St. Valentine’s Day to honor St Valentine.

Today, Valentine’s Day means many things to many people.  To some, it is a day to give and receive gifts.  They look forward to beautiful gifts that will leave lasting impression in their lives.  Expectations are always very high among couples and not getting a gift from a partner is always regarded as not showing love.

To many it is a day of Indulgence.  This is mostly practiced by singles; they indulge in all kinds of things including immoralities all in the name of Valentine.  Some will go as far as losing their virginity in order to secure a Val.

To others it is a day to seal their love.  Many marriage proposals are done on this day and those with trouble and broken marriages finds it a suitable day to renew their vows and restore peace in their homes.

These are some of the reasons why people celebrate Valentine but to you, what does valentine mean.

To me Valentine day is a symbol of true and selfless love.  True love entails total self giving as Christ did on the cross of Calvary.  True love has no selfish interest; it is not hateful or self servicing.  It has no end.

Love is man’s true nature as man was created in love that is why it is said that man is the product of self diffusive goodness of God’s love.  Therefore man is mandated to love and live in love (1 John 3:11) ‘Love One Another’.   This is why every man celebrates and desire love irrespective of religion and age.

As we celebrate this year’s Valentine’s Day, let us purify our love so that we can have a better relationship, better marriage, better faith practices and eventually a better world. 

4 Reasons Some Relationships Don’t End in Marriage


It is true that it takes the decision and agreement of both partners who are involved in a relationship to make it work and culminate into marriage, this success can only be achieved if partners are ready to unravel certain problems that are likely to stop the relationship from ending in marriage. 

You may have been in a relationship for many years hoping to get a marriage proposal from your partner but alas! He is not forth coming.  Perhaps the whole thing is getting unbearable and frustration is setting in, you are about quitting, you need to check if there are some issues stopping your partner from making such decision.  These five issues may be responsible for the break-ups:

Family Resistance: 

Albeit you and your partner may love each other very well and are interested in spending the rest of your lives together, the unsurpportive attitude of either of the family can be very devastating on the relationship.  Most times you hear young women say “it is between me and my husband” and doesn't care what any other person may feel, this assertion is very wrong because when a family especially that of the man is not ready to give a hand, the man finds it difficult to make a decision.  He may not tell you the war going on in his family just because he loves you and will not want to hurt you but then the decision to go ahead with a marriage is unlikely.   

Traits Men Cherish in Women

Traits Men Cherish in Women

Our team of investigators went round to inquire from the men what exactly they mostly cherish in women which will make them stick to a woman till death do them part.  Our revelation will greatly amuse you.  I am glad to present to you some of the responses we received, please read on.

Prudence:  The first man we talked to actually cannot stay with a partner who is reckless especially in spending money regardless of how rich he may be.  He can die for a woman who is sensible, cautious and wise.  He is of the opinion that a prudent woman will encourage her husband to save for the future while a reckless spender is only interested in her immediate comfort.

Fear of God:  This particular group can only stay with a woman who knows God and have strong faith in him.  This trait according to them will make it possible for the woman to be peaceful, prayerful, effectively manage the home well and raise good and responsible children.

Supportive:  70% of those we interviewed said they will never leave a woman who is caring, accommodating and able to stand by their side no matter the circumstance.  They said she must show deep interest in the overall well being of her man, believe in his aspirations.

Patient:  Our statistics show that almost all the men said they cannot cohabit for long with a woman who cannot endure with them.  They believe that a good woman must not be easily provoked or irritated and should be able to bear different conditions they may find their selves.  She should be tolerant, not nagging and open-minded.

How to Handle Situations When Things Suddenly Change Negatively

How to Handle Situations When Things Suddenly Change Negatively



Bernard owned two motor spare part shops and was doing quite well.  He has a wife and four kids, with the high income he earn from the shops; he was able to put his children in one of the best and most expensive schools around.  Although his wife is a trained nurse he never allowed her to practice her profession because according to him, he can afford the money that his wife will earn in salary.

Life was so good with Bernard and his family until suddenly he lost his two shops to fire outbreak and because he has no insurance cover for his shops, life become so difficult.
Bernard is not the only one in this kind of situation.  There are so many people out there who have lost their sources of livelihood because of the global economic recession.  Jobs are cut down and many people ended up losing their once plum jobs and those who managed to get another, have to accept low salaries.

The question now is how we can handle situations when things suddenly change negatively for us.  Though we cannot rule out to be totally disorganized, having the feelings of anguish, acrimony and unhappiness, a wise person must always not show hopelessness in the time of distress.  The following tips are some of the wise things to do in the face of inevitable.

Adjust Your Lifestyle: 

To change to a lower standard of living is undeniably very tough but that is unfortunately the wise thing todo.  Just communicate to your family that things have changed so that they too will adjust to the new reality.  Many people find it difficult to accept this change and continue to live as if thing are still the same.  They live on borrowed money so that people will not notice they have fallen.  Living a fake life will make you incur more debt which makes life more miserable. 

To be able to cope with this present challenge, Bernard who was living in a one story duplex, relocated his family to a room and a parlor apartment and transferred his children to a government school where he no longer pays school fees and the children are still having quality education.  They also cut down on expensive food items and foreign trips.  Despite losing his properties, he is still able to continue with his life because of this wise decision to adjust his lifestyle and accept this new challenge.

Be Ready to Do a New Type of Job:

Those who are accustomed to white collar jobs finds it difficult to do menial jobs and those who do business on their own, who are their own bosses do not find it easy to work under anyone when unavoidable happens. They feel people will talk about them or look down on them for accepting lower jobs.  You should remember that what people say or feel about you can never put food on your table.  Bernard after losing his investment took to driving job.  He was doing this to make sure that his family never suffers.  His wife also got a job in a private hospital and today they say they are happy.

Be Happy: 

A happy person is one who is contented with the way things are.  This does not mean to be lazy or accept defeat, but being happy in hard times is keeping those who wish you bad confused.  They wonder if the problem is actually affecting you.  Let us see what the Bible said in being happy with every situation you may find yourself.  In Philippians 4:11 and 12, Paul said “I have learned in whatever circumstances I am to be self sufficient.  I know how tolive in want and how to live in abundance”.  
Keeping yourself happy will also give you the strength and focus to plan on the next line of action.  When you are unhappy and down, you will lack concentration and ability to move ahead.

Turn to God: 

Although I have put this point last in this post, it is the first wise thing to do. God is very much aware of what you are going through but he wants you to tell him your problems.  Do not run from place to place looking for solution.  Learn how to pray fervent and effective prayers and if required, fast.  He will surely make a way where there is no way and you will see a dramatic improvement in your financial situation.

I hope you will see good results.  


I hope this is helpful.  See you in my next post.  Do not forget to let me know your take on this in my comment box                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         
How a Lady Can Draw the Attention of a Decent Man or Husband to Herself

How a Lady Can Draw the Attention of a Decent Man or Husband to Herself


I have seen situations where girls find it difficult to be attracted to men even though they are good looking, intelligent and rich.  Those who eventually come their ways are not as a result of love but for what they can enjoy from them.  Have you found yourself in this type of situation? Do you worry that even when they are ready for a relationship, after few outings together, they disappear?

The fact remains that every young man will look for a girl who can form a strong partnership with him in future and when it comes to relationship that leads to marriage, the matter is beyond beauty, riches and intelligence.

The following are some of the traits required to make a young girl very attractive.
1.              
        Have a Mind of Your Own:  Men will always love a girl who can form her own opinion and express herself in an honest and respectful way. Not a girl who will agree and say yes to everything they say (Oh Yes Member).  You must have your own goals and be sure of what you really want to do with your life.

10 Ways to Show You Love Your Spouse


·    Show interest in your spouse’swell being and be ready to solve his or her problems.

·     Defend your spouse in the public no matter the situation.  Be on your spouse’s side even if the situation is not favorable.

·        When your spouse asks for a favor, consider saying “it is my pleasure”.

·     Giving your mate an unexpected hug, a surprising romantic kiss, teasing tickle and drop a love note often.

·        Be spontaneous and surprising with winking at your spouse.

·  Share memories by looking at old photographs and talking about memories you shared together.

·        Share why you love each other.

·    Give the gift of your life by doing chores for your spouse, such as folding the clothes, bathing the children, running an errand, washing the car etc.

·        Plan and cook meals together.


·  Dance with your spouse in your living room in the presence of the children.

Childlessness and How to Handle the Problem


Childlessness describes the state of an individual or a couple who does not have children. Childlessness can be either involuntary or voluntary. Voluntary childlessness is also described as childfree (the couple are medically fit, financially okay but decides not to have children) and it is practiced by only few couples.  The causes of childlessness are many and it has great personal, social and political connotations.

For most of history, childlessness has been regarded as a great personal tragedy, involving much emotional pain and grief, especially when it resulted from a failure to conceive or from the death of a child particularly when the couples are well advanced in age.

Before people began to understand the process of conception, childlessness was usually blamed on the woman and this in itself added to the high level of negative, emotional and social effects of childlessness on the woman.

Childlessness is one of the major challenges of marriage.  In the bid to curtail this challenge, medical practitioners have come out with so many suggestions on the causes of childlessness like infertility both in the male or female; they have also tried to solve these problems with the latest scientific discoveries in medicines and drugs. However, almost all these solutions have been nearly messed-up by nature. The reason for this is that, many women whom the doctors have declared childless have given birth in the later days and many women whom the doctors said have no problems are yet to give birth. 

What then can we say is the cause of childlessness? Is it sin? I have seen so many men and women who have been committing sin since they were born giving birth; I have seen armed robbers, prostitutes, even witches having children. 

Some people have also attributed childlessness to pregnancy abortions committed while at a younger age.  This is not always the truth because women with a history of multiple abortions do have children.  (I am not justifying abortion here because it is an abomination before God; I am only using it to stress a point).  For some others, they say that family genetics and physical stature are responsible for barrenness.  This is also not the truth because I have seen women whom their mothers gave birth to so many children becoming childless and I have also seen those that came from families that have the history of childlessness giving birth to so many children. Some people have said that women with short statures finds it difficult to give birth but this is also a bundle of lies for I have seen short women even dwarfs giving birth to so many children.

What on earth is the cause of childlessness?  Whatever the cause may be, the fact remains that no one can authoritatively say the exact causes; so we are going to leave that to God to answer because I do not know.

What I do know is that, childlessness does happen in marriages causing serious marital problems in the family, in some cases, couples go their separate ways or they are advised to test their capability outside the matrimonial home and the resultant effect is best imagined.  As a result of this, I try to proffer some useful suggestions on how to handle the problem especially those that have serious challenges from in-laws and relations.
6 Tips to Spice up Your Marriage

6 Tips to Spice up Your Marriage

Marriage is an institution you will never graduate from, because you learn new things everyday.  Sometimes in our desire to have a ‘dream marriage’, we go into marriage with high hopes, set unrealistic goals and expectations for our partners, when they do not meet our demands, there bound to be problems.  Mostly, we think that a partner is at fault, we don't see our own fault.

For a happy union, the following tips are necessary:

1. Don't Set Unrealistic Goals for Your Spouse.  Have it in mind that human beings are imperfect and do not think your partner will meet up with all your expectations in the marriage.  In fact, when it comes to marriage, love is the foundation and it covers everything.  Although it’s not enough for marriage, friendship and trust must be part of it so that the union will stand the test of time. When you have this at the back of your mind, by the time you notice some flaws from your partner, you will not be so much disappointed because you already know that such things must surely come up.  This keeps the marriage going.

2. Always Think of What Your Contribution will be in that Marriage.  If you really love your spouse you will only think of contributing to his or her progress in life; how he is going to be a better person and how to make your marriage a mini heaven instead of what you will gain from the marriage.  Personal sacrifice is what keeps a marriage strong.

3. See Disagreements as Strengthening Strategies:  Let me tell you something, couples fight almost everyday.  At least in a week, they must have one or two things to disagree on.  It is natural.  Conflicts between couples are not negative by nature.  It is just the fundamental experience of differences between husband and wife.  Because couples experience conflict doesn't mean they don't love each other.
Dealing with differences in opinions, interests, and desires and so on is normal in every relationship.  The bottom-line is that couples must handle these differences maturely.  So, couples must work hand in hand to deal with their differences instead of working away from each other.  If conflict is handled maturely, it will strengthen a marriage.  So, ask yourself this question:  “Am I ready to strengthen my marriage?

4. Establish Good Communication Network.  There is no way marriage can be successful without good communication.  It is the life wire of every union.  Communication is 95 per cent in every successful marriage.  For this reason, couples must really work hard at good communication in their relationship.

For healthy communication, never discuss anything of importance when you are angry, upset or feeling tensed.  Only discuss with your spouse when you are in a relaxed mood.  There must be room to talk together, don't be too busy not to talk to your spouse.  Husband, if you don't hear your wife, she will go outside to purge her mind, so you must let her talk to you.  Carry your wife along in anything you do and do not discharge her suggestions without regard.  Make her feel important.

5. Don't Kill Your Partner With Too Many Demands.  Don’t make him or her carry one hundred percent of expenses at home.  Share your money with your spouse because you are now one.  Spouses must discuss financial situations together.  Don't let your partner feel he or she doesn't have a grip.  Talk together of your income, how much can you help me with? Once a man feels he is the only one shouldering financial responsibilities, it will lead to resentment.

Sharing is a team work.  If there is resentment, remember the reason why you are married to the person, Ephesians 5:2: “Live a life filled with love for others, following the example of Christ, who loved you and gave himself as a sacrifice to take away our sins.  And God was pleased because that sacrifice was like a sweet perfume to him”.

6. Humble Yourselves Before Each Other. Work with your partner in wisdom so that your prayer will be answered.  If you take care of your partner, you have taken care of yourself.  Give your woman audience and hear her out.   When you stay too much alone, you will do odd things.  Above all, marriages are happier and enduring when husband and wife submit to each other.  Ephesians 5:21 says: ‘And further, you will submit to one another out of reverence for Christ’.
Discover the Role of Sex in Marriage and Tips To Keep Your Sex Life Alive.

Discover the Role of Sex in Marriage and Tips To Keep Your Sex Life Alive.

Sex plays a lot of role in marriage and the family; it unites husband and wife, it solidifies their love but lack of it can destroy a very promising union.  No wonder the Bible says that once a man and a woman is married, they have become one, they are no longer permitted to hide their bodies away from each other.

Investigation carried out shows that majority of men who commit adultery or go the extra mile of marrying another woman are as a result of sex punishments they receive from their wives.  Some men even sleep with their house help or sister-in-laws in order to get at their wives. No matter how busy and tired you are, you should not use it as an excuse to deny your husband sex because it is his right. A woman must be ready to satisfy her husband sexually in order to save her marriage, deliver her husband from adultery, avoid infidelity and prevent sexual diseases.

You should not use sex as a weapon of punishment to your husband when there are marital problems because this has a way of turning back against you.  I have discovered that men love sex as much as they love food and when they are denied of it, can go any length to satisfy themselves and damn the consequence.

Tips to Keep Your Sex Life Alive.

Sex doesn't have to get boring in marriage.  As the years go by, your sex life should getbetter.  Here are some tips to keep your marriage and sex life fresh.

1.           Do not expect your husband to be the only one in your marriage who initiates romance.  You both have the responsibility for having an intimate and successful marriage.

2.       Communication is the key to a healthy and active sex life in a marital relationship, so talk with one another about sex.

3.               Share with one another your sexual desires.

4.     Talk to one another about your expectations concerning lovemaking. False or unmet expectations can hurt your marriage.

5.    Sexual intimacy is a continuing process of discovery. True intimacy through communication is what makes marriage work.

6.    Sex in a long lasting relationship can deepen and become a richer experience.  No matter how many times you made love to each other, the wonder and awe of mutual attraction can still be there.

7.    When life becomes busy, and schedules are hectic, plan for sexual encounters with one another.  Make sex your main priorities.

8.       Try to set the mood in advance.

9.               If you want to have good sex at night, start the foreplay in the morning.

10.  Let your spouse know you care and are thinking about him/her throughout the day by notes, e-mail, photographs, hugs, chats, phone calls etc.
Discover the Devastating Effects of Divorce on the Family

Discover the Devastating Effects of Divorce on the Family


Before making that hasty decision to end your marriage, think carefully because divorce does not always end marital problems.  On the contrary, it merely exchanges one set of problems for another. 


The Bible also does not treat divorce casually.  It states that God views as treacherous and hateful the frivolous putting away of one’s mate, perhaps with the motive of taking another spouse.  Nevertheless, the Bible allows for divorce on one ground- sexual relations outside marriage (Adultery).  Therefore, if you learn that your mate has been unfaithful, you have the right to terminate the marriage but must remain unmarried until death.  


Others should not impose their view on you, and it is not my intention to do that because in the end, you are the one who will live with the consequences; therefore, you are the one who will decide what you really want for your self.


Hence, even if you have scriptural grounds for divorce, you would do well to give serious thought to what that step will entail so that you do not regret your actions.  Below are some of the effects of divorce on the whole family.

How to Repair a Broken Marriage

How to Repair a Broken Marriage


Is your marriage broken or about to collapse? Are you ready to save it?  Is that really possible? The owners acknowledge that their house is in a bad condition, but they have decided to restore it.  Would you like to do the same with your marriage? If so, where will you begin?  Try the following suggestions.

·        Identify the problem.  What is it that has interfered with your marriage? Is the problem from you or your spouse?  In one sentence, write out what you think is lacking or what you want changed.  Understandably, the problem you identify may be different from that noted by your spouse.

·             Make a resolve.  Work it out and agree with your mate that you will work together to restore peace to your marriage.  Make the sacrifice of playing the fool to lead in the restoration mission.  Try writing your decisions on paper.  When both you and your spouse are committed, saving your marriage becomes a team project.

·                    Set a goal.  Where would you like your marriage to be six months from now?  What specific improvements would you like to see? It requires working hard to avoid any conflict within this restoration period. Write your goal on paper.  When you have a clear vision as to what you need in your marriage, your goal will be easier to attain.

·        Apply Bible Counsel.  Once you have identified your problem and discovered the improvements you would like to make, look to the Bible for advice.  Its principles are timeless, and they really work.  Isaiah 48:17; 2 Timothy 3:17) for example, the Bible encourages you and your spouse to be forgiving.  Indeed the Bible says that “It is beauty…to pass over transgression”.  Proverb 19:11.

Top 10 Marriage Mistakes That Can Ruin Your Marriage

Top 10 Marriage Mistakes That Can Ruin Your Marriage

The Following are the most common marriage mistakes that can destroy your marriage:

1.           Lack of Respect – Don’t badmouth your spouse to your friends or associates, spouses need to be thanked.  They need to know they are appreciated.

2.           Not Listening to your Spouse – This includes allowing your mind to wander, paying more attention to your work or television set, ignoring body language and interpretation.

3.       Lack of Sexual Intimacy – This is a death knell for a marriage.  Seek medical counsel and therapeutically counseling if your sex life is weak.  Don’t leave your spouse wondering why you aren’t interested in sex.


How To Remain A Significant Figure In Your Husband’s Eye

How To Remain A Significant Figure In Your Husband’s Eye

It is also possible to remain the woman he met many years ago.  It is real and here are a few steps to achieving this.
1       Be The Woman He Fell In Love With:  Why not let your man see the beauty of whom you are when he fell in love with you?  Let your natural beauty (external and internal) shine out more than wearing make-up or trying to be someone you are not.  Make sure you let your husband see it all the time.
2    Put Variety In Your Life:  Avoid doing the same thing every day in every aspect of your personal expression and overall marriage life.  According to www.ehow.com surprise him even through simple gestures such as wearing a different dress or Blouse, wearing your hair a little bit differently or cooking something he hasn’t tried before will spice up your marriage.

3     Be Free When With Your Husband:  It is true that problems, concerns and worries are part of life but do not let them affect your interaction with him.  Try your best to enjoy your husband’s company without letting him see that you are affected by life’s care.



Marrying For The Wrong Reasons

Marrying For The Wrong Reasons

People give many reasons for getting married.  Most times, people feel the only good reason to get married is because of love. Yes, love is essential but then, there is a great difference between likeness and love.  There are many instances when we like someone very much and mistake that for love.  This is a very common situation among women, and once they are married, they find out that they are no longer compatible with their partners, because they married for the wrong reasons in the first place.

In some instances, it is believed that no one is really in love at the time of marriage, as it is believed that the real love starts after the marriage has taken place.  Many relationship experts believe that love only happens when both parties have had sufficient length of time to know each other and share different experiences together.  They say all you can only be in love with is the result of your imagination of what you want the person to be, which could be devastating and a rude shock when you find out that you got married to the wrong person and for the wrong reason(s).

Many couples fall into the trap of disappointed expectations, because they had imagined that all would turn out well despite the hurdles they must have overcome in getting married in the first place, without knowing the other person very well.

The worst of all are those who marry to get away from unpleasant situations; for security reasons or for money.  These kinds are very much affected later in the marriage, because even with all what they anticipated, they still seek the comfort of real love in the marriage.

Some women get married for the most horrible of reasons such as:

·                   All your friends are getting married:  As most women approach the ages of 25 – 30, they feel time is fast running out on them, that everyone in their age group is married.  Attending every other person’s wedding reception cannot only be frustrating, but could also make them look left out.  But then, this is not enough reason to just go ahead and marry any man that comes your way so that you can also be called Mrs.

·                    You want someone to support you.  This could be because you are unemployed or poorly paid. There are low-income jobs or family financial problems and many reasons like cash flow problems these days.  However, rushing into marriage for financial reasons is never a good idea.  Just because he’s Mr. Moneybag doesn’t mean he is going to make the perfect husband.  I know of a couple who married for this wrong reason.  The lady was in a financial fix and the man came into her life at that time.  Now she can hardly stand him and being married to him is worse than hell as she is just living a life of a shadow of herself.  She regrets the marriage, as she says to anyone willing to listen that there’s no compromise to real love in a marriage as she did.

There would be more successful marriages if people could take the time to know each other first before they seek to explore the mind of someone else.  It is very easy to mistake physical passion or romantic infatuation for genuine long-lasting love.

One of the ways to prevent getting married for the wrong reason is not to date until you are ready for a romantic relationship that may lead to marriage.  Why get seriously “in love” with someone when you have no intention of getting married to that person?  If the relationship drags on for too long, there is the risk of it getting stale and the couple spending a lot of time patching up bad feelings.  When the time comes for marriage, they are more in love with love itself than with each other.

A common mistake made by most young people is that they never allow themselves to experience a significant period of their youth unattached.  From the time they understand the meaning of the word love, they have serious relationships, which often cause them to expend their energy in extremely long telephone calls, sleepless nights and failing grades, loss of appetite, etc. Thus, they miss the joy of developing genuine friendships that do not lead to romance.  That is, they are locked off from establishing other relationships.  When you start “going out of circulation” too early in life, you will end up in a marriage that will lock you away from a world of happiness, freedom and growth.  This is one reason why pre-marriage counseling for all couples is vital.

So, how many marriages turn out right?  Well, the odds are bad because the increased rate of divorce in our society is an indication that most people get married for the wrong reasons.  My dear friends work hard to avoid getting married for the wrong reasons; it’s not worth the eventual disappointment and disheartening pain in the end.
Polygamy – How to Avoid Marrying More Than one Wife

Polygamy – How to Avoid Marrying More Than one Wife

It has been a long time I have been talking to the women, so I decided to give this valentine gift to our men in this article.  I am also directing this issue of polygamy to the men because they are the people mostly concerned with this menace.

What is polygamy – This is a practice or custom of marrying more than one wife at the same time.  The man who practices polygamy is a polygamist.  Many men go into polygamy either as a result of their religious belief, custom, by mistake or to show off their wealth.

Most European Countries forbid polygamy and offenders are charged with bigamy, while the practice is still acceptable in Africa and some Asian Countries.  In this case, the question in everyone’s mind will be, is the practice of polygamy right or wrong, is it legal or illegal?

My answer will be straight forward.  No one can authoritatively say if it is good or bad, legal or illegal because its practice has been discovered to be based either on religion, custom or a way of life and it will not be wise to condemn someone’s religion, custom or way of way.  While the modern Christians see it as a taboo, Islam permits it with a specific number of wives one can marry at a time.