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| Drawing by: Paul Onwumere |
These unfortunate things that happen to them do in some cases led to their death and therefore calls for urgent attention for every stakeholder of this young ones.
While
these girls will not be blamed for their woes, many of them have actually lured the men
into harassing them by dressing half naked, exposing all the essential parts of
their body.
Others have the problem of peer pressure, not being contented with who they are (wanting to be like another), lack of self respect, impatience etc.
Others have the problem of peer pressure, not being contented with who they are (wanting to be like another), lack of self respect, impatience etc.
Recently
a video that was uploaded in the internet (YouTube) showed a girl who stole certain items from a Shoprite Outlet in Nigeria. She hid her loot in her pant but unfortunately
she was caught by some security men guarding the outlet. The most disgusting
side was how the security men got her naked, tore her legs apart to bring out
the loot.
This beautiful girl who in a normal circumstance would never talked to such men not to talk of touching her body was now being rolled on the ground with her legs torn apart by them. This is what lack of self respect and not being contented can cause.
As
I managed to watch this video, I said oh! This is a big disgrace to womanhood
and more so a let down on woman personality, so I decided to be part of the solution to this ugly. As I mused over the whole
issue, I was able to come up with the following solutions which I have divided
into sub headings. We are going to treat them one after the other:
- Charity Begins at Home
- Do You Really Know Your Daughter
- Who is in control, You or Your Daughter
- Respect Your Womanhood
CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME
The first institution for molding a child is the home and it is assumed that parents are the most influential role model a child can get. How is your home front? Is it conducive enough to mold a wife, mother and a future role model? Are you a good teacher? A good teacher must teach with character and also by word of mouth. Are there rules and regulations in your home or do you operate in anything goes. Do you inculcate in your children the needed right morals?
How
did you start with them because, this determines and measures the standard they
will live their lives? Do you tell them
that what is wrong is wrong or do you paint wrong things to look like
right. Do you set standard for your
children or do they set standard for you.
Every good home must have dos and don’ts. Do you reward the ‘dos’ and punish the don’ts.
Bringing
up a girl child has its own peculiar difficulties and challenges. There is this fear in the mind of the parents
of what will become of her; will she defile herself or will she bring shame to
the family, how will she find a good husband etc but following these steps will
make it easier and enjoyable for you and your daughter.
Start her early life with God.
The Bible says: “train up a child in the way she should go and when she is old, she will not depart from it” Set God’s standard for your daughter, show her the way of God, let it be her watchword and she will never go out of that way even in the most difficult situation, she will never forget where she is coming from.
The Bible says: “train up a child in the way she should go and when she is old, she will not depart from it” Set God’s standard for your daughter, show her the way of God, let it be her watchword and she will never go out of that way even in the most difficult situation, she will never forget where she is coming from.
Show Interest in Her Affairs:
The Bible also says: “Two cannot work together unless they agree” How close are you with your daughter. Are you so close to her that she can trust you with her little secrets? Does she change her topic of discussion when you show up? If this is the case, then there is trouble. You need to call her for a chat now, tell her how well she is cherished, tell her that your love for her knows no bound except for such and such characters that she has. It is time to be interested in her affairs if not you will loose her forever. Show her your love so that she can depend on you whenever she runs into trouble.
The Bible also says: “Two cannot work together unless they agree” How close are you with your daughter. Are you so close to her that she can trust you with her little secrets? Does she change her topic of discussion when you show up? If this is the case, then there is trouble. You need to call her for a chat now, tell her how well she is cherished, tell her that your love for her knows no bound except for such and such characters that she has. It is time to be interested in her affairs if not you will loose her forever. Show her your love so that she can depend on you whenever she runs into trouble.
Operate on Her Level:
As a parent particularly the mother, you are the closest person to your children and they want to learn from you, but if they find out that you do not have what they want, they will not bother to ask for your advice. If you do not go with the trend of things happening around, they will feel you are old fashioned, that they know more than you and will do things on their own which is part of why they run into troubles. It is time to empower yourself with knowledge of how to handle issues so you can be able to direct your daughter. Do not be too rigid or highhanded; be pragmatic and flexible in your dealings with her. Be her friend, relate with her on her level and she will trust you.
As a parent particularly the mother, you are the closest person to your children and they want to learn from you, but if they find out that you do not have what they want, they will not bother to ask for your advice. If you do not go with the trend of things happening around, they will feel you are old fashioned, that they know more than you and will do things on their own which is part of why they run into troubles. It is time to empower yourself with knowledge of how to handle issues so you can be able to direct your daughter. Do not be too rigid or highhanded; be pragmatic and flexible in your dealings with her. Be her friend, relate with her on her level and she will trust you.
Be Inquisitive:
Always inquire about everything happening to your daughter even when she does not want you to know, ask questions when you are confused. For example, ask when she had her last menstrual period, when she expects the next one. Ask her needs; let her know you are capable of meeting her needs until she is able to take care of herself. Also let her know how smart you are and that you are in control of your environment. This will make her not to over-step her boundaries and be cautions in whatever she is doing.
Always inquire about everything happening to your daughter even when she does not want you to know, ask questions when you are confused. For example, ask when she had her last menstrual period, when she expects the next one. Ask her needs; let her know you are capable of meeting her needs until she is able to take care of herself. Also let her know how smart you are and that you are in control of your environment. This will make her not to over-step her boundaries and be cautions in whatever she is doing.
Be Protective:
Parents and guardians should be able to give adequate protection and security to their daughters because they are the endangered specie. So many girls have fallen victim to sexual harassment rape, ritual killings and other kind of dangers while trying to cater for themselves. Providing them with most things they need will go a long way in curbing the dangers they are exposed to. Research has shown that 80% of these victims of circumstance are those who are poor and disadvantaged.
My
dear friends I will like to hang on here.
Next time I will continue with our number two solution “Do You Really Know Your Daughter?”Till then, have a splendid time.